hate it...love it...

i decided this weekend that i hate and love weddings the same amount at the same time...

i love weddings because i love the symbolism of the ceremony... i love the roles of the attendants... what their "jobs" mean... i love the symbolism behind the father giving the bride away... the lighting of the unity candle, the vows... i love the way i've seen every groom look the first time he sees the bride in her dress...

i hate the way it feels... i hate the way that there is so much emphasis put on the ceremony that we forget to pray for the marriage... that the day is nothing compared to the lifetime that a couple is going to spend together... i hate the formality of it all... i hate sitting there thinking it's never going to happen to me... i hate that i always cry - even if it's not sad... always...

i'm thinking there might be other stuff that i hate and love at the same time the same amount... but i thought i'd throw that one out there... it hit with full force this weekend...